


Final Fantasy VII vs. Bravely Second - Yuffie Kisaragi vs. The World

by sanctum_c



Category: Azumanga Daioh, Bravely Second, Dishonored (Video Game), Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Crack, Crack Crossover, Gen, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Yuffie Kisaragi/Cloud Strife if you squint, cat master asterisk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 15:49:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2817737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanctum_c/pseuds/sanctum_c
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's an intruder in the cat house in Wutai. Yuffie stalls Avalanche's return to the Eastern Continent to investigate and as a result gains more power than she ever dreamed of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Final Fantasy VII vs. Bravely Second - Yuffie Kisaragi vs. The World

**Author's Note:**

> This is _entirely_ Raaj's fault after a Skype conversation about the Cat Master asterisk bearer.

"Yuffie!" Shake ran up and began dancing from one foot to the other.

"What is it? We need to get going."

"We've had reports there's someone loitering in the cat house."

Yuffie drew in a hissing breath as Cloud scratched his head. "Cat house? The one with all the cats?"

She looked at him in exasperation. "Of course the one with all the cats. What other house are we going to have that we refer to as 'the cat house'? Honestly." Cloud grimaced, glancing at the other members of Avalanche for moral support. None seemed to be forthcoming. "Right. Well, we'll be a little delayed in departing, 'cause I need to deal with whoever has decided that that house is not a cat only sanctuary. My cat only sanctuary," she added after a moment.

Yuffie gestured at Cloud and Tifa. "You two, with me." She turned and stalked away, her companions trailing along after her. The rest of Avalanche were heading off to finish prepping the Tiny Bronco for their return voyage. Yuffie was certain that keeping Cloud around would prevent her new friends from just ditching her. As much as they seemed to have accepted her apology, there was a touch of anxiety she could not quite dispel.

Yuffie took a deep breath and kicked the door of the cat house open. Alarmed yowls sounded from the cats as they scattered around the house. Within a few seconds all the cats had vanished into hiding places. 

A girl looked up and blinked at them as the cat she had been stroking bolted up the stairs. She wore a stylized tiara, shaped to give the impression of cat ears and a cat shaped cushion rested against her back. Yuffie blinked. No. It was as if she was half-wearing it; the cat's front legs formed arm-length sleeves and a red ribbon around her neck held the assembly in place. The cushion had a tail with a pink bow and a hollow, crowned head flopped back over on itself, vacant eyes staring at the ceiling.

Yuffie strode into the house, glaring. "What do you think you're doing here?"

The girl blinked again. "I was playing with the cats?" There was the trace of an unfamiliar accent in her voice but Yuffie paid it no mind.

"Who are you?"

"Minette Goroneth," the girl replied. "I am the Cat Master asterisk bearer."

"The wha-?" Yuffie began, breaking off as the girl shifted the ribbon around her neck. The attached bell jingled as she moved, the movement revealing a leather cord holding a small stone close to her throat. It had a familiar glint. "Is that materia?" Yuffie asked, staring at the gem.

Minette frowned. "No, this is an asterisk."

"What does it do?" Yuffie asked, already anticipating the answer.

"It allows me to fulfill my role as Cat Master."

"Sounds like materia to me," Yuffie said grinning.

"It does look very reminiscent," Cloud concurred, peering over his friend's shoulder.

"So, by chance, if you're wearing that gem, you become a Cat Master?" Minette nodded. "And, going out on a limb here, but that then means that you can make cats do whatever you want?" Another nod. "Definitely cats? Not ducks?" 

The intruder frowned, tilting her head to one side in confusion. "I am a Cat Master. Not a duck master."

"Just checking," Yuffie said, staring around the room. "Cats like that one right there, yeah?"

The stranger looked in the direction Yuffie pointed. A tiny tortoiseshell cat peered out from under the stairs.

"Yes," Minette said, wriggling her fingers at the kitten.

"Cool," breathed Cloud.

"Guys," Tifa interrupted. "We're wasting time here. Plus I'm not sure either of you should have the ability to control cats. I'm still dubious it's even possible."

"Ah, come on, Tifa. We're only loo-. What are you doing Yuffie?" 

Yuffie sprang forward and tore the jewel from Minette's neck. The stranger opened her mouth to protest but before she could speak, Yuffie had the cord and gem tied against her skin. There was a flicker in the air around her, and now Yuffie wore an identical costume to Minette.

"The power," Yuffie mumbled staring at her hands, now obscured by the cat costume. "The power," she said louder. "Yes. Yes, I can see it all now. No one can stand in my way anymore." Yuffie's grin was huge.

Minette got to her feet and advanced on Yuffie. "You need to give me that back now," she said. She opened her mouth to speak again, but got no further as Yuffie gestured. A sea of cats erupted from all corners of the room, burying the stranger beneath them.

"Yuffie," Tifa exclaimed. "You can't just kill her over a materia."

"Kill her?" Yuffie asked spinning around. "What kind of murderous jerk do you take me for? Look, she's fine." She gestured to the prostrate Minette, who lay beneath a hoard of cats, each purring in contentment.

"Help," Minette said. "I can't move them. This is the worst." A cat nuzzled her face. "And the best. Ah."

"See? She'll be fine. As long as we remember to either move the cats or bring her some water later she'll live. In the mean-time," Yuffie said, as she cracked her knuckles, "I'm going to have a few words with my father."

* * *

The fight with Godo lasted ten seconds. Five of those were Godo assuming the first stance in preparation for whatever Yuffie might try to use against him. The other five were his wide-eyed disbelief as the wave of cats erupted into the room and bowled him over. Yuffie Kisaragi became ruler of Wutai by evening. Avalanche held off their departure for a little longer as Yuffie reveled in her new found power. Any dogs still resident in Wutai became pale shadows of their former selves. A new law now required all citizens to own and care for at least one pet cat. Any cruelty or mistreatment to a feline was now the worst crime imaginable. The sentence? Death by cat nibbling. No one dared oppose her now.

Pursuing materia had been a waste of time. She should have been searching for this 'asterisk' all along and Yuffie wondered if there were any others out there. Maybe she would seek out more later. For now, she had it all. Control over cats, Cloud, and a populace of loyal cat lovers. Now was the time to confront and defeat Shinra. Yuffie's army made land-fall a few days later, and in less than a week the Eastern continent was hers. Every Shinra installation was now under her control. Materia flowed back to Wutai, the nation prosperous in a way it had not been in so long.

Their enemy was not slow to retaliate. They sent the Turks after her. The quartet were soon brought round to Yuffie's side thanks to a set of adorable kittens - one for each Turk. A trained assassin tried to use an army of rats against her. Yuffie was overcome with laughter as the the man with a tattoo on his hand pulled off his metal mask. He stared in disbelief as his rodent army made her cat army very happy, very full, and purr very, very loud. He bowed his head and pledged allegiance, wanting to learn how she had achieved such magics. Yuffie just grinned, not really listening when he told her his name. Corvette? Coravllis? No. Cortina? She shrugged. It did not really matter.

The Shinra company did not stand a chance after that. Yuffie strode into the lobby of the Shinra building, every cat from every country surging in alongside her. A secretary named Sakaki was overcome in a moment, and sank to the floor, quivering. She was later promoted to Chief of Cats of the Western Continent and spent each day in bliss. No one dared to stand in Yuffie's way as she ascended through the building. Rufus Shinra was demoted to litter box attendant and Yuffie took over the Shinra tower. 

Her loyal guard cats littered the floor, ready and waiting for any attack. Yuffie stared down at Midgar below her and smiled, the smile soon becoming a laugh. Oh, she had held this in too long. She had mocked that assassin but this was the laugh she had wanted to do the whole time. Yuffie cackled, sucking in a deep breath to laugh louder. It had been too cliché before; something a villain in a cheesy old story might do. But now, with the world under her sole control, Yuffie figured she had earned it.

* * *

Yuffie cackled again, staring off into space. She was sitting near the tip of the Tiny Bronco's wing, looking out across the ocean as the plane sailed away from Wutai.

"You are sure she picked all the loco weed out the herb supply before she cooked her breakfast?" Aeris asked, murmuring into Cloud's ear.

"Pretty sure," he replied, hoping he was right.

"Either way, I'm not sure I trust her to do any cooking from now on," Tifa said, as Yuffie threw her head back and cackled at the sky.

**Author's Note:**

> The specific description of the asterisk is based on the _Bravely Default_ manga. The ability of the Cat Master asterisk to possibly control ducks is based on some throw-away tumblr jokes after the asterisk was announced.


End file.
